The panic was clear in the prose of the message posted to the Crown Heights Patch’s neighbor post board: MISSING!!! CHICKEN!!

“I was losing my mind, honestly,” said chicken mom and couples sex counselor Lovetta Taillor, 37. “She went adventuring, apparently.”

Patch’s investigation ended in victory Wednesday when we learned Penguin the missing chicken had been returned to her Crown Heights home the night before, after a nearly two-week-long “vacation” in spot not most marauders would choose: a nearby parking garage […] Click here to view original web page at

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